What I Know for Certain at 42

It’s my birthday this week ( November 8th) I don’t know about you but I am not big on surprises. I have always been a ‘don’t make a fuss’ kind of girl. I love celebrating low-key style on the noise, but loud and deep when it comes to spending time with my people. People are my greatest gift.

When I use to live in Devon or Monaco I use to gather a few of my closest friends for afternoon tea or breakfast at a good boulangerie/patisserie and that was sacred for me. It has been just over 2 months since we moved here and I don’t know many people yet to make a birthday outing, I am trying, but as we all know these things take time.

So, I am celebrating with you today! Because that’s what’s happens usually on my birthday. I am imagining I am seating around a table with you and together we are sharing our hearts, hardships, happiness and hopes as we munch on some cake and sip hot coffee. I will start first and then I will wait in anticipation to hear from you. I wanted to share what `”I know for certain at this age. ” Here it goes …

  • I don’t feel old, but I look old. I like to have my teenage body but can’t, so I am gradually embracing my hip size and my thighs rubbing.

Time is precious, but timing is even more valuable. The timing and the tone of the words said, the timing of the visit committed, and the timing of our presence devoted weigh heavier than time.

  • Being thankful and remaining thankful is the greatest uttering prayer I can say. Notice I did not say ‘feeling’ thankful, for God knows life is harder and has challenges to question any gratitude, but this I know: Thankfulness is an attitude of the heart, not a response to life’s circumstances.

Life is hard, even harder if you are looking for others to fix it.

  • Family is what birthed me but there are so many other things that have shaped me and are shaping me as I type. ( I am talking here about our mothers and fathers and our family of origin, whether we know or not our parents, whether we had a good or challenging upbringing, we can move on beyond that with compassion and courage )

My thoughts are more important than I pay attention to. ( I remind myself that “as a man/ woman thinketh so he/she is”)

  • Honestly and truth and kindness and love have to be given in equal measure. Truth without love is harsh to take, and Love without truth is lying.

I love books, books awaken a part of me that without them stays dormant.

  • I love Nathan and my children more than my life. My love for them has been tested and tried and proven truer than any other conviction I hold.

God is real, God is love and He is good. Like the air that I breathe,
I don’t see him in physical shape, but He is my life. This is not blind faith, for I know him ( through the scriptures/ Bible, Jesus’ life expanded in history, the Holy Spirit and the Saints ( the community of believers.

  • My mood (as a wife, mother and woman) colours the environment I am in like nothing else does. I have the power to change my mood easier than I think.

Friends are vital to my life, but what’s even more meaningful is the space we give to our friends to change, be themselves and leave if that’s their choice.

  • You stop learning you stop living

I need to Nurture myself before feeding others. This is not selfish. We are spiritual beings living in a body. The body without the spirit is just a shell. So, to strengthen my spirit for me means to get up with quiet and prayer and meditation. To go for a walk in nature, to reflect and re-gather any scattered senses before the world sees me, that I have found is the best gift I can give to myself and my world every day.

  • I am changing. I am not the same person I was last year, last three, five or ten years. Change comes about to us all. I am aware, I need to be aware often of that because I want to change and become a better person than yesterday.

Encouraging people is what gives me great enthusiasm. Sure I need to do it with wisdom and prudence, but I see it as my calling.

  • Writing is what untangles my thoughts and reasoning to the truest order. I often resist it as I am surprised by what comes out of it, but I am apprehensive and happy when I write.

Travelling and adventuring with my family and friends are my deepest indulgence. I love who we become when we travel.

  • I understand and love my parents more as their wrinkles deepen and their bodies lapse. My siblings and their families are a treasure to me.

Life has a way of going on. Whatever you and I might be facing right now, good or bad, difficult or impossible, this too shall pass. I know that the tendency is to want to hold on to the good and resist the not-so-good, but all will pass eventually, what matters is who we are and who we are becoming as life carry on.

  • I know I am in a good and true company ( family and friends and people in general) when I don’t need to compromise who I am to be with them.

I am a Truth and Table kind of girl. I love the sound of cooking and the clinking of glasses and my house full. I believe Hospitality and Holiness are closely related. Deep friendships are forged while sharing a table and sharing our lives.

  • I don’t know what my future holds, but I hold on to the Hope that God who holds my future is with me, I shall not fear. I am convinced that because of Jesus (in the words of Jonathan Edwards) “Our bad things will turn out for good. Our good things can never be lost. And the best things are yet to come.” 

Looking forward to hearing from you on things you are certain at 🙂

Lea xx

“Our bad things will turn out for good. Our good things can never be lost. And the best things are yet to come.”

Jonathan Edwards